Life Lessons from The Sandlot

“You’re killing me, Smalls”, is one of the most repeated quotes in our house from the great movie The Sandlot. If you haven’t seen this movie yet, its a ‘must see’ for anyone interested in youth sports. The movie documents many life lessons that are getting lost in youth sports today.

For those who are not familiar with the reference, Smalls is a pre-teen boy who recently moves into a neighborhood in southern California. He is an only child that was never taught how to play baseball and a new step-father that loves baseball but hasn’t had the time to teach him. Nevertheless, he is invited play sandlot baseball with the other boys because they need one more.

The quote is rememberable because it highlights the frustration we all experience when playing with someone who doesn’t know the rules or expectations. In the movie, Smalls doesn’t have the experience or social context, much less ability, the other boys seem to know intuitively.

Love of the game

I love this movie for many reasons, but the one that stands out the most is they play for the love of the game.  The kids come together everyday in the summer and just played the game.  They didn’t keep track of the score or who had the most hits.  They played for fun and to get better at the game. The boys unanimously agreed on who was the greatest player of all time, Babe Ruth. They all played their hearts out trying to be just like the “Great Bambino”, although acutely aware of their individual limitations. Kids need spend a lot more time just getting out there and playing for fun. Don’t worry about the score or who hit the farthest ball.  Just go out there with a bunch of friends and play the game.

Connections

In the movie there was little they did besides baseball. Although, occasionally they went to the pool for a swim. And we all know how that ended! I love that my kids can pick up a ball and bat and just go out there and play.  It might not be with the neighbors, or at our local field but they find a way and get to play the game.

One of my favorite summertime memories is during an organized baseball game for my son. All the siblings of various ages and genders, get together and play their own game on the playground next to the baseball field.  If there isn’t a field available they find a way to improvise the game. They gathered at the playscape with a tennis ball, a few mitts and a bat. They agreed to use the slide as first, swing as second and if it goes over the monkey bars its a home run! This is creativity shows their love for the game. They want to play anywhere and anytime.

However, now that I’m older I realize the real value is the social connections the kids build. They are building memories that will aspire to recreate in everything they do the rest of their life.

Life Lessons

This interaction teaches them:

• how to communicate with peers;
• compromise to solve problems;
• keep focused on a common goal, and;
• support and encourage teammates.

All because even kids know, you can’t win alone. Therefore, becomes a naturally supportive and collaborative environment. Moreover, they are learning and practicing these skills just because they were encouraged and allowed to ‘just play’. The irony is the families were together at the same park because of an organized baseball game.

I think most of us would watch the kids playing on the side game with a warm smile. The pure joy, passion and laughter of an impromptu game is easy to enjoy. Everyone enjoys watching people, at any age, have fun because the fun it is contagious.

Although, “You’r killing me Smalls”, suggests frustration with a ‘newbie’. The movie uses the line as a relatable trigger point to highlight a decision made by the hero, Benny. He happens to be the best baseball player in the neighborhood. His response, as a leader, it to teach the less skilled.

Yet, many of the same people will turn 180 degrees toward the organized game. It seems perspectives change when they see full equipment, uniforms, coaches, umpires and chalked lines. All of a sudden, the stakes are higher, the anxiety is greater and we forget it is just a game. Moreover, the lessons inferred by kids in this environment seem to be focused only on performance and results. Support and collaboration seem to be lost as the competition matures. However, any adult that has been part of a high performing organization understands that support and collaboration on any team are key drivers of success.

Be the Change

Play My Kid was created to shift the focus of youth coaches to ensure sports are fun, creative, supportive and collaborative. Parents really just want to see their kids play with others. The most successful, respected and admired people in our world, regardless of ability, are engaged, friendly, happy, kind and helpful. Clearly, it is very difficult to practice those skills while sitting on the sidelines.